Looking back at the past 3 months I have to say we got a rough start, but it is getting more fun by the day now. The first 2 months, and especially between 6-9 weeks, were really though. It was not easy to figure out this little person, since they cry when they are hungry, sleepy, have a wet diaper etc.... And everybody who always told me that you will start to recognize the different cries, I never really did when she was so little. She just seemed to cry the whole time. That was of course hard for me, but I also felt really bad for Jill. She just didn't seem to be happy. I think the breastfeeding had to do a lot with it now that she starting crying 90% less since we switched to bottle feeding. I had a hard time with feeling confident, because I just never knew if she was still hungry, and that made me and probably her as a result of it nervous. Now I feel even worse wondering if she has been hungry for quite a bit during that time. But we figured it out and that is most important. Now she smiles and is happy almost all the time!
Also I realized the other day that I really had to get used to a new routine and that it was sometimes hard for me to give into Jill's schedule. When you are used to doing your own thing for 30 years (well more like 10+ years) it can be a bit difficult at times that everything takes 2x as long and you can only do half the things you used to do in a day (if you are lucky). Of course I never minded this, but I just had to grow into it. But I still think that is better than hoping for a pink cloud from the start during pregnancy and than being confronted with reality. I was realistic from the start and got to enjoy Jill more and more each day instead of the opposite.
On top of this all I was really sick and had to recover which sometimes maybe made me irritated quicker than I would normally be. I should also mention that I appreciate my sleep and man those broken nights........
After 3 months of getting to know each other I really enjoy being a mother and am totally in love with our little pumpkin. I look at her all the time when she is awake, and when she sleeps I look at her pictures. I have to get back to work soon, so that will be hard. Luckily Sean will be home b/c of our moving situation and I don't have to get used to a work-day care schedule just yet. But for now I still have 2 weeks off and am enjoying them with Jill to the fullest.
Here is "ons kruimeltje" at 3 months old!
